Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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