The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
