nut hugger
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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