I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
