So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize