Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
