Me too!
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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