he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
You are the jesus of drinking
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
