weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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