Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
