We won't sleep together?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Randomize
