he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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