She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
