Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
So squirting runs in the family.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Randomize