I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
