Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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