Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Sorry about my life...
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
