The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Barsexuality is the new black.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
