ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I miss vodka workout Fridays
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
