He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
