He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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