I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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