A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize