She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
