I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
