i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
