Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Please don't give away my fajitas
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
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