I wish I could teleport
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I forget how to act sober
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