physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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