She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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