I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize