A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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