sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
