haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I love you.
Bad choice
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
