is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
