from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
