and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I feel like death gave me a hand job
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Enjoy the penises
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
