I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
My vagina is very pro this idea
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
