theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
i out mim tonsoeep
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
