and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
