so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Randomize
