I can't watch pbs sober anymore
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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