sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Bring me that man meat
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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