you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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