Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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