you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
