idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
