I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
