We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
