How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize