I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Randomize
