Your dad touched me again.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
